On giving - or trying to give - zero fucks
I read this quote from Krysten Ritter today and I love it.
I've thought a lot about this. There's a lot of that we can do as women. By straight up being nicer to each other. By putting great characters like this on screen, and people feeling represented and heard and OK in their own stuff, makes people feel OK. Maybe we don't always have to wear fake eyelashes and big barrel curls. Maybe we don't have to always have a fake f*cking tan and feel pressure to look really sexy all the time. When I go out of the house, I don't have anything on my face, I have my hair up, I have like jeans and a f*cking jacket. The more we show real sides of women as they are, that's going to continue to feel normal and feel good.
I was interviewed today and was asked why it's important to me to build community among handmade artists in Tacoma. It was an awesome question, and part of my answer was that every time a women is rocking her handmade business, it inspires and empowers other women, and the next generation, to do their own thing, whatever that is. I organized and attended a workshop last week on cultivating stillness in your life, in order to be come more effective and productive. I envisioned it as a sort of business jumpstart event but it really resonated with me on a personal level. One of the wonderful teachers, Ashley Looker of Unique Holistic Happiness, said that "what the world needs is the real you."
I have been thinking about this a lot, what I would be like, look like, in the absence of my perceptions of other people's expectations. Moving west was freeing, to see moms and professional people with "weird" hair colors, tatoos and piercings. It inspires me. Being a mom inspired me in that not working professionally allowed me to dress however I want. I've had a late in life love affair with see through shirts and pleather leggings. Who knew? But it's awesome. I wear makeup when I want, do my hair (or not), wear leggings or a pretty dress, glasses or not... it's really a wonderful privilege to dress however I want and not give many fucks about how other people perceive that. My favorite lyric from the last few years is Nikki Minaj's "I give zero fucks and I got zero chill in me." That's pretty true these days. No chill, no fucks.
I've thought a lot about this. There's a lot of that we can do as women. By straight up being nicer to each other. By putting great characters like this on screen, and people feeling represented and heard and OK in their own stuff, makes people feel OK. Maybe we don't always have to wear fake eyelashes and big barrel curls. Maybe we don't have to always have a fake f*cking tan and feel pressure to look really sexy all the time. When I go out of the house, I don't have anything on my face, I have my hair up, I have like jeans and a f*cking jacket. The more we show real sides of women as they are, that's going to continue to feel normal and feel good.
I was interviewed today and was asked why it's important to me to build community among handmade artists in Tacoma. It was an awesome question, and part of my answer was that every time a women is rocking her handmade business, it inspires and empowers other women, and the next generation, to do their own thing, whatever that is. I organized and attended a workshop last week on cultivating stillness in your life, in order to be come more effective and productive. I envisioned it as a sort of business jumpstart event but it really resonated with me on a personal level. One of the wonderful teachers, Ashley Looker of Unique Holistic Happiness, said that "what the world needs is the real you."
I have been thinking about this a lot, what I would be like, look like, in the absence of my perceptions of other people's expectations. Moving west was freeing, to see moms and professional people with "weird" hair colors, tatoos and piercings. It inspires me. Being a mom inspired me in that not working professionally allowed me to dress however I want. I've had a late in life love affair with see through shirts and pleather leggings. Who knew? But it's awesome. I wear makeup when I want, do my hair (or not), wear leggings or a pretty dress, glasses or not... it's really a wonderful privilege to dress however I want and not give many fucks about how other people perceive that. My favorite lyric from the last few years is Nikki Minaj's "I give zero fucks and I got zero chill in me." That's pretty true these days. No chill, no fucks.
 |
| Me with my never-would-have-done-in-DC sherbet hair |
But then I think, was I really that constrained when I lived in DC? Did I "have" to wear suits or "professional" clothes? Would people have respected me any less if I'd flown my freak flag? I don't have the answer. But what I do know is that I want to get to know my friends and community as their full, weirdest selves. What should my opening line be? I'm thinking something like, "if you could magically transform into any person for a week, who would it be?" When I used to hire people for research positions, I'd ask candidates if I told them I'd fund it, what research project would they do just for the fun of it? It always threw people so off guard! But I wanted to know what was on their minds. And I want to know what's on YOUR mind. Are you enjoying this blog? Should I write more? About something different? This blog for me is an exercise in getting words out purely because I want to, for no business or professional reason whatsoever. But I'd love to hear how it might be able to serve other purposes, to help or inspire. So, comment below if you're so moved!
Comments
Post a Comment